A league without fouls

No Foul

The year: 2013. Thanks to the new penalties instituted by the NBA in October of 2012, all flopping has been eliminated from the game. But these rules didn’t go nearly far enough. Players have responded by diminishing their core strength and maintaining a high center of gravity, increasing their chances of falling over legitimately. Gregg Popovich has pioneered the “reverse screen,” intended to channel the on-ball defender into his check at a high speed. Dirk Nowitzki now spends entire offensive possessions on one leg, and Nike has teamed up with Dwyane to market the first set of high heels for basketball, the “Pump Fakes.”

Massive discontent with this state of affairs led to the recent ouster of David Stern as commissioner. He has been replaced by Jeff Van Gundy, whose first act was to abolish the foul in the NBA. These rule changes have paved the way for a new superteam, destined to dominate the postseason for years to come.

STARTERS:
Gilbert Arenas
J.R. Smith
Metta World Peace
Kevin Love
Jordan Hill

RESERVES:
Jason Kidd
Tony Allen
Stephen Jackson
Gerald Wallace
Jason Smith
Kevin Garnett
Andrew Bynum

The starting backourt of J.R. Smith and Gilbert Arenas is the best in the league at containing dribble penetration. Continue reading

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Episode 147: Breaking Down the Roster

Today Jay and Marc give their comments on what is most likely the final roster, the anti-flopping rules, compares the Knicks to the Nets starting lineups, Royce White’s dilemma and a ton of listener questions.  Download Episode 147

Episode 128: Season Wrapup with Robert Silverman

Robert Silverman (@BobSaietta) from Knickerblogger.net joins us to lament over what could have been.  We cover everything from acient proverbs, to acting to some actual basketball talk.  We talk about the coaching situation, the Knicks free agents and who should come back and answer a bunch of listener questions.  And since it’s been a while we thought it would be fun to end the season with Two Heated Minutes.  Download Episode 128

Some thoughts on Game 5

  • I’m not sure if Jeremy Lin was able to play or not, but 85% sounds like he could have.  Chandler played with the flu, Amar’e played with half his hand stapled together, Jeffries couldn’t even walk, Bibby died 3 years ago and you couldn’t play 10 minutes?  It’s not like it would kill his market value, he can’t make more than 5M next year so one bad game wouldn’t have done anything.
  • I hate that we had so many injuries but loved how much heart most (not you Lin) of the players showed even though we were terribly outmatched.
  • Mike Woodson couldn’t try zone even once?  Did we make any adjustments this series other than to cut Novaks minutes?
  • Novak needs to learn to shoot off the screen.
  • Fields….you look so good sometimes and then you lose the ball on a drive in the 4th to kill what small momentum we had.  Throwing the ball in LeBrons face was fun to watch.
  • Just Ridiculous Smith – I know he is a streaky shooter, but I didn’t know the streak went from mediocre to abysmal. 
  • Miami fans are the worst.  We saw the shirts on the empty chairs.  Also, learn ONE other chant other than LETS GO HEAT.  I swear the only other chant I heard was MVP for LeBron, which they strangly chanted after a ball got thrown in his face.
  • Has there every been a play where Battier on defense or Wade on offense didn’t end up on the floor?  And have either of them ever not been shocked when a foul either wasn’t called on the other team or was called on them?
  • Does Spoestra tell everyone on the team of flop constantly or did they come up with that idea during a players meeting?
  • Can we officially say Amar’e has the worst contract in the NBA or does that one good playoff game negate a season of garbage?
  • I really really miss the old team.  I refuse to believe that if we never did the Melo trade, and signed Chandler we wouldn’t have finished as a 3rd seed this season.
  • Lets go Pacers!

Episode 127: Interview with Tommy Dee

We interview Tommy Dee (@TommyDeeTKB) from The Knicks Blog.  We talk about game 4 in detail, Amar’e stepping up, Just Ridiculous Smith, Baron Davis’ injury, Lin vs Nash, rooting against the Heat, the suspicious calls during the series, all time favorite Knicks, and some playoff predictions.  Download Episode 127

Episode 121: Breaking Down the Heat Game

We talk briefly about the scrimmage against the Wizards and then go into detail about the Heat game.  We talk about the Knicks players’ value, the Mavs strategy this season and the difficulty of building and maintaining a very top heavy team.  Download Episode 121